At one of the national brand restaurants I worked for, we received two e-mails:

• Each was concerned with a complaint from a customer.

• Each included the text of the original complaint.

• Each was forwarded to us from the highest levels of the company.

• Only one was worth a damn.

The first e-mail was from the president of the company. It began with a letter from a customer who was a doctor. He had observed an employee accidentally cut himself. No big deal normally, but instead of properly sanitizing the knife, board, and area where he bled, the employee wiped it with a paper towel and kept serving customers. As anyone with any experience in restaurants, blood, or basic common sense can tell you, this is a major no-no and unfairly puts customers at risk.

The second e-mail was from our franchise group’s operating partner. It, too, began with a letter from a customer. This customer had been using the restroom and observed one of the restaurant’s managers leave the restroom after performing the kind of hand washing (three, maybe five seconds, no soap) that is more likely to spread disease than it is to kill it. Again, anyone familiar with food service, pathogens, or common sense can tell you that this was a major no-no that unfairly put customers at risk.

Both e-mails contained some talking points from the president or operating partner along the lines of “don’t do this - there will be consequences,” and delivering that message was the point of sending the e-mails.

So, what was the difference between these two e-mails?

It was the customer’s complaint.

In the first e-mail, the writer was respectful, clearly thoughtful and educated, and seemed concerned that this dangerous event be properly addressed. He recounted his observations, shared the consequences he could foresee from the problem, and politely requested further information. By the end of the e-mail, I wanted to apologize to him and guarantee that the situation would improve, despite having no involvement in it. The e-mail carried a gravity and level of impartiality that only eyes from outside of the organization could.

In the second e-mail, the writer was belligerent, profane, insulting, and even went so far as to suggest that the manager was intentionally trying to get customers sick. (An absurd accusation on its face - one that seems even more reckless to anyone who has ever experienced the hurried result of needing to pee during a rush.) By the end of the e-mail, I wanted to find this guy and punch him in the throat. It gave him a level of credibility on par with Baghdad Bob.

Both of these e-mails addressed very serious problems that were direct results of customer complaints by sharing the complaint. The problem was that the second complaint was made by someone who was (and this is being generous) so upset that he lost any sense of how to properly address his concerns.

I knew the operating partner who forwarded the e-mail, and I can tell you that he was not abusive, demeaning, or even ill-tempered. He was a great person to work for. But when he chose to forward the text of that e-mail, he made it his message, along with its curmudgeonly demeanor.

Given the importance that the delivery of your messages has for your young employees, my claim that the second e-mail wasn’t worth a damn isn’t entirely accurate. That second e-mail was worse: it was downright damaging.

Friday afternoon as I was sitting in the office, I caught an exchange  that got me wondering if despite all our immodesty and confidence that perhaps Gen Y has a soft spot for criticism, particularly when it comes to blogging.

It all began with this tweet:

@AlexJMann: You know “Gen Y” blogging has become a farce when the unemployed are giving career advice. It brings irony to a whole new level.

And then the fireworks started:

[Note: I've cleaned out the RTs and @replies to make this a bit more readable.]

@CarlosMic: Amen!

@BlakeSunshine: I think that’s a pretty unfair generalization. I’m a Gen-Y blogger with a real job too.

@JRMoreau: Agreed. I think that’s a pretty unfair generalization.

@ImNickArmstrong: Agreed. Hucksters abound, but that sort of generalization is bone stupid, Alex.

@Carol_Phillips: I agree as well [with JR, Nick, and Blake]

@AlexJMann: Blake, You have a job. Great, you’re not my target. The unemployed kid writing career top ten lists–I’ll call bullshit every time.

@BlakeSunshine: Fair enough, but don’t call all Gen-Y blogging a farce

Holy cow!

So what do we think, folks? Is this an example of a generation that is overly sensitive about criticisms of its own norms while it doesn’t hesitate to tear down the norms of previous generations? Or is it a fair defense against an unreasonable charge?

Updates!:

Blake Sunshine shared her take on her blog.

Carol Phillips offered up a couple great posts on generation Y’s perception of itself here and here.

It’s official: the H1N1 epidemic has ballooned to epic proportions. And I’m not talking about the disease itself. I’m talking about the epidemic of people  freaking out about a lesser version of the seasonal flu.

If we had the time, we could study this hysteria and learn lessons about about common sense, the realities of disease transmission, statistical significance, and the effects of the mass media on different populations. But since we’ve got our hands full trying to get the most out of young employees, we’ll look at what it can also teach us about communicating with them.

Today I read a report that a university has asked students not to play beer pong because they might transmit swine flu to other students. Dr. Leslie Lawrence, medical director of the school’s health center, sent a message to students saying, “While it might seem fun over the weekend, it will not be enjoyable when you and your friends are sick and missing class or midterm examinations.”

Because he made that statement, Dr. Lawrence is going to play the starring role in today’s edition of “DON’T EVER DO THAT. FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR BUSINESS. SERIOUSLY. DON’T.”

The way I see it, Dr. Lawrence made four glaring mistakes in that single sentence.

First and foremost, the good doctor has used a pretty condescending tone. “While it might seem fun” is an irritating construction that suggests (a) that he knows better than we do what is fun, and (b) that we are incapable of evaluating the possible consequences of a given activity.

Second, Dr. Lawrence’s has threatened weak consequences: missing classes and exams. He’s not breaking any hearts with those outcomes. Just ask my freshman economics teacher - I frequently missed class without being sick. If it was too cold out, or too nice out, or I had slept too little, or too much… Moreover, if I needed a few days to study for an exam and I knew that “I have swine flu” could translate into a reason for a teacher to keep me out of her class, I would definitely “come down with it.”

Third, doctor’s vocabulary is outdated. “Examinations” are not something college students take today. I took tests in college. I took exams in college. I never once took an examination because I didn’t go to school in the 1950’s.

Lastly, the doctor isn’t concerning himself with the issues reality suggests he should. Beer pong is a drinking game that has been played on college campuses for a good while now. Diseases like mono and cold sores have been present during that time, and presumably the doc hasn’t sent out blast e-mails cautioning students about the risk of getting those college classics after playing beer pong. It appears he didn’t even send one about the seasonal flu, which the CDC reports kills 36,000 Americans annually. (Swine flu has reportedly killed 5,400 people worldwide.)

So, aside from looking like I’m making a mean-spirited attack on a well-meaning medical practitioner, what points am I trying to make about communicating with your young employees?

1. Don’t talk down to your young employees. We can tell. You are not our parents. Don’t tell us to take our jackets when it’s cold.

2. If you’re going to threaten consequences, make them real consequences. I remember in high school a typical punishment for cutting class was to suspend the student. It’s hardly a deterrent when it’s what the person wants in the first place.

3. Don’t talk like it’s 1950. It’s the year 2009. Use natural language. (Props are due to the doctor, though, for not trying to use colloquialisms with which he isn’t familiar.)

4. Don’t come to me with crazyness. If you’re going to unravel a new policy aimed at stopping $0.07 of loss at an expense of ten minutes of my time (at minimum wage that would be a cost of $0.73), I’m not going to buy in. While your young employees might sometimes lack the level of social sophistication you’d like, we’re products of the information age. That means we are sophisticated consumers of information who have a lot of data, analyze it, and draw conclusions rapidly. Give me the data that sells me on your proposed change, or don’t give me the proposal at all.

So keep these points in mind next time you’re dealing with your young employees, lest you start your own epidemic of bad communication techniques.

I just got a puzzling text message from my manager informing me that we’re having a pizza party on Saturday, and that we should try to get another one next week.

I don’t know if it’s a reward for something we did, or if we simply had a pizza budget that we needed to go through. Aside from a random act of awesome pizza-ness (a real word, I assure you), I’m not sure what to attribute this to.

Random acts of kindness make the world a better place. I won’t argue that. But targeted acts of kindness can make the workplace a better place. If I can see that a pizza party is the effect of a certain cause, my goals will shift to meet that cause. So if the cause is a sales goal, or customer service surveys, or punctuality, or anything in my control, I’ll set myself to it. But if I’m kept guessing as to why I’m enjoying the pizza, I won’t know exactly how to respond.

If you’ve carefully considered your goals and decided that using social media is a good way to help you build relationships with your Gen Y employees, there are a number of different strategies that you can use. Doubtless, there are thousands of strategies out there, but here are three effective strategies that can start you down the road.

Before I hit those, I’ll again emphasize that the best way to determine what’s best for your staff is to ask them. They know what they’ll respond to and what they won’t, and they won’t hesitate to tell you if you ask.

1. Create a group on an existing social network.

Rather than simply adding your Millennials as friends, create a group for your staff. Whether it’s on Facebook (the network with which I’m most familiar because I use it most) or MySpace or another that your staff prefers, let the group be a place where they can interact with each other. If you’re really brave, let it be a place where they can provide you with honest feedback, so that you can work to manage them more effectively.

2. Create a social network of your own.

Starbucks has created its own internal social network, as have a number of other large companies. But you don’t need a Starbucks Grande Size Budget to do this. Go to ning.com, and you can create a network with just a few clicks. Much like the group, this will allow your staff a place to interact that is their own. Be warned, though, not all young people are looking for another social network to join, and this option can become time-consuming on your end.

3. Start an internal blog

Rather than using social networks, create an internal blog. Then, rather than dealing with profiles (and the inevitable inappropriate pictures, quotes, etc.), you can simply post an idea or a thought or something as a blog post, and then allow employees to comment on it. Blogs can be password protected, so you can set up the blog so that it is password protected, thus allowing you to limit the conversation to your staff. A blog on WordPress is free and easy to use.

With the extraordinary reach of social media (sites like Facebook or MySpace, blogs, or Twitter) in Generation Y, there is no question that these tools can be used to build connections with Millennial employees. But before you ever sign on to a social networking site for your work purposes, there are three things YOU SHOULD CONSIDER VERY CAREFULLY:

1. Do you really want a look at this person’s private life? As tech-savvy as Gen Y can be, they can be pretty naive in terms of privacy. I know I’ve had more than one regrettable picture show up on Facebook after a wild Friday night. If you don’t want to think about your young employees making stupid decisions, of if you can’t handle finding out what they say about their jobs when they’re not there, don’t even sign up.

2. What will other people think about the actions you take? Ask yourself this: If I were a 16-year-old girl’s parent, how would I feel about her 35-year-old manager adding her as a friend on MySpace? How would your HR manager feel about it?

3. Exactly what are you looking to accomplish? Remember, the purpose of this exercise is to focus on building relationships with your young employees so you can manage them more effectively. If they feel like you’re spying on them, or if you’re spending time but getting no ROI, this isn’t something you should be doing.

In my last post, I looked at a couple of strategies that use text messaging to help build positive relationships with Generation Y employees. But I also know a lot of managers and supervisors have questions about when to text versus when to call versus when to e-mail or IM, or whatever form of communication exists out there.

The most important thing I can tell you about this is that you need to check with your young employees to see what they prefer. As much as we’d prefer that all Millenials can be managed the same way, the simple fact is that just like any other group of people, there are a huge variety of preferences within the group.

So, rather than trying to share with you the hard-and-fast rules that apply to every single young employee, I’m going to share some my preferences with you, to get you thinking about what you’ll need to ask your young employees.

Things I want managers to text me:

1. Addresses, phone numbers and e-mail addresses.

This saves me the trouble of writing them down.

2. Questions that can be answered briefly.

This prompts me to answer, and doesn’t force me to undergo the brain damage of trying to fit a 10 page thesis into 250 characters.

3. Brief responses to the texts I have sent.

Unless I say otherwise in a text, I prefer the response to also be a text.

Things I don’t want managers to text me:

1. Anything long.

It’s a small screen designed for a short message. If it’s more than about 3 sentences, think twice before sending it.

2. Anything non-critical on my day off.

If there’s no fire, don’t text me.

3. Single words.

With the exception of someone acknowledging that they have either received something of mine or that we’ve reached agreement on a plan, I don’t really see why you’d bother to take the time to send a one-word text - or waste my time reading it.

Your turn

Leave a comment to share what you prefer to get and prefer not to get via text message from your boss or employees.

When it comes to communicating with your young employees, text messaging is likely to come up, if for no other reason than the fact that you’ve likely got two or three employees who can’t stop texting while they work. Just how widespread is this form of communication with teenagers? The New York Times recently reported that American teenagers sent and received an average of 2,272 text messages per month.

With that kind of engagement (addiction even?), it’s no surprise marketers and parents are looking closely at texting behaviors, and as someone who works with Generation Y, you should know how to leverage this technology.

Here are two ways I have seen managers effectively employ text messaging when working with Millennials:

First, text can be useful for quick, simple communication.

When you have a single question that requires a brief answer, sending a text is often easier than a phone call. I have my phone on me almost all the time, and most of my friends are the same way. Whatever we’re doing, we can almost always find a little bit of time to respond to a text message. I’ve sent and received texts on dates, at baseball games, while driving, and in a variety of other situations where I would never accept a call from my  boss. (Note, however, that text is not a great way to request something like coming in on a day off, as it’s much too easy to ignore.)

I’ve seen a lot of managers who text occasionally to pass on new details, ask quick questions, or request quick favors. Anything along the lines of:

"Come in at 9 instead of 8 this morning."

"Where are the cover sheets for the TPS reports?"

"Can you re-send the budget e-mail? I can't find it."

You should be careful, however, that you don’t make it a habit to text me when I’m not working, unless it’s to inform me of a schedule change or something that is extremely urgent. (A) If you aren’t paying my cell phone bill, I don’t want to spend my limited texts working for free. (B) When I’m not at work, I’m not working, and it’s quickly going to cause our relationship to deteriorate if you keep intruding into my personal time.

In addition to sending texts when you have a question, I suggest making yourself available for the same sorts of questions via text, so that your employees can ask you their questions in a way that suits them. Whether it’s a question about scheduling or the location of a particular document or tool, I find it incredibly helpful to have a manger or boss make him or herself accessible for those kinds of questions via text. Do yourself a favor though - establish some guidelines so you aren’t getting 3 a.m. texts asking what time your opener works the next day.

Second, texts can be a great tool for providing recognition to employees.

So, it was a long, hard day, and everyone just walked out the door a bit angry, despite your best efforts to make things go smoothly. Maybe you just want them to know that you appreciate all the time and effort they put into their work.

Or maybe it was the kind of night that makes you glad you work with an incredibly talented team of young employees, and you want to show them a little recognition.

In either case, by sending a text message to your team, you have the opportunity to quickly, immediately, and effectively communicate your appreciation to them. By sending a text message maybe 10-15 minutes after they’ve left, you’ll be reaching most on their way home, and you’ll be letting them know that their contributions are valued. Sometimes, this little knowledge can be the difference between wanting to quit and wanting to do a better job.

Examples include:

"It was rough tonight, team - thanks for pulling through."

"Great close tonight! I appreciate all your efforts!"

I wouldn’t suggest doing this so often that it becomes expected or meaningless, but every once in a while, it’ll be a great way to let your team know you appreciate them, which is a great way to build a positive relationship with them.

The other day, I was asked a great question on Twitter by Gary Thill, the editor of Aquatics International Magazine (Check him out on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/aquaticsintl). Mr. Thill had asked what the twitterverse thought was important in managing Gen Y, and I told him that building genuine relationships with employees is what I would point to as priority number one. Then he asked me:

“Since Gen Yers communicate so much through texting, and social media, how do you build relationships?”

That there is an insightful question. And one that is very difficult to answer in a mere 140 characters, so I figured I’d give it its due with a blog post. In fact, it’s going to be a two-part answer, with today’s post focusing on what I want from that relationship and my next couple posts focusing on the ways that new technology can change that game.

My generation is redefining the concept of “relationships” as we go through our daily digital lives. We don’t need face-time to feel like we’ve got a relationship with someone. Part of the cause of this change is technological. Courtesy of tools like Facebook or Twitter, I can know what people in faraway places are doing at any given second, see pictures or videos of their most embarrassing moments, and converse with them in real time. All of this without ever going to Singapore, Sydney, Madison, or wherever. I can learn more about someone with 10 minutes looking at his Facebook profile than I might be able to in a 10 minute conversation with him.

Consequently, I don’t feel the need to physically meet people in order to get to know them. Certainly there are people I am interested in seeing on a more than digital basis, and I derive considerably more satisfaction from those interactions than I do from my Facebook friends.

I’m also very comfortable categorizing my relationships and treating them differently. Some are for work, some for school, some for day-to-day friendship. Each requires a different level of engagement on my part, and I expect a different level of engagement from each.

When it comes to the work relationships, then, what am I looking for? Certainly it’s a little different with each boss, each job, and each co-worker, but there are a few things I always look to get out of a work relationship, whether I get them digitally or in person.

First, I want to be respected for the work I do. And, no, I don’t consider my paycheck “respect” for what I do. It is what you give me in exchange for doing my job. A part of our relationship as an employer and employee, I need you to include (a) some sort of congratulations for doing well and (b) include a picture of the difference I make for your business. I’ve never enjoyed working for a boss who didn’t let me know that my successes were appreciated, and who didn’t help me understand how those successes fit into the bigger picture.

Second, I want to be valued for who I am. I understand that as a front-line worker for a billion dollar corporation, I am small cog in a very big machine. But as my day-to-day manager, I don’t want you to treat me like a replaceable part to a machine. I’m a person, and I’d like to be treated accordingly. Take an interest in my welfare, ask about my hobbies or my family, discuss one of our common interests with me.

Third, I need you to lead me. Yes, I want to know when I’m doing well. But at work I need someone who knows the way and who will put me back on the correct path if I stray from it. Bosses who are so interested in being my friend that they allow me to make mistakes can create one of two situations: (a) I consistently mess up, and feel good about the work I do until some sort of crushing reality check comes when I get a new boss or talk to an honest co-worker; or (b) Boss eventually gets so fed up with my incompetence, and explodes at me for having problems the boss should have been fixing in the first place. Both of these have the same end result: our relationship ends badly.

If you can bring those three elements to a workplace relationship with me, we’ll get along quite nicely.

I’d like to conclude by re-posing the question that I’ll be addressing in my next few posts: How can a boss bring this kind of management to the table in an age when texting and social media seem to be the norm for communicating?

Tell me if you’ve ever been here:

Friday morning, we have a meeting. Things are going swimmingly, until a handout comes out, covered in acronyms I’m unfamiliar with. Some are easy enough to figure out based on context, but there are a couple that are completely foreign to me. Everyone else is sitting there,  using them with the same ease that I’ll employ various “colorful” expressions on a Saturday night with the guys.

And I have no idea what this meeting is now talking about.

Panic moment, right? I don’t want to look like a fool. Especially when it turns out to be something that every educated person should know.

So, what should I do?

Wait!

The coffee shop two floors down had free Wi-Fi. If I can connect to that, I’ll be able to Google the term and figure out what we’re talking about.

Connecting to network… Good.

Signal “Very Weak”… Uh-oh.

Connected… Score!

One 15 second Google search later, I knew what the acronym meant and was able to pretend I knew all along.

The Morals of the Story

1. If I happen to be plugging away at the keyboard during a meeting, it’s quite possible that I’m doing something work related. I can listen and type at the same time, so don’t assume that I’m not paying attention.

2. No wonder I always want to have my phone, laptop, and other toys with me.

3. No wonder I don’t particularly like asking questions in a group. I’m not used to doing it.