At my loss prevention job, I write the schedule. It’s a department of four people, so it’s not a difficult schedule to write. In fact, the hardest part is not giving in to the temptation to give myself the sweetest shifts and stick everyone else with the painful ones.

A few days ago, I asked everyone to fill out new availability sheets. Just after telling me that he was on break from school, one of the other employees handed me a sheet that listed his weekend availability as follows:

SAT: 12-5
SUN: 12-5

I was flummoxed. The store is usually open 10am-9pm, and since it’s retail during the holidays, we’re looking at days where we’re open 7am-11pm. So, I asked him, “Is there any reason, other than it’s not fun, that you can’t work full days on weekends?”

He said, “Not really.”

Apparently he missed “availability” day when we did vocabulary in school.

With that said, I have to admit that I’ve pulled the same stunt on employers. Until I started writing a schedule, I was unwilling to recognize the existence of the “schedule request.” I would simply title a sheet “TJ Wihera’s Availability” and list days I was unable or unwilling to work. I refused to even recognize the suggestion that as an employee I was making requests.

My philosophy was based on the fact that my arrangement with my employer was “at will” - I know this because it was in the contract I signed. As such, our agreement was that I would work when it suited us. I certainly couldn’t come in on days the employer didn’t want me to. So, why should it be any different on days I didn’t want to work?

It is frustrating to be on the receiving end of this. Especially since I’m going to end up eating closing shifts if I don’t schedule him. I’ve seen this effect before, though experiencing it is less fun than watching it. I call it the “finding out how your actions affect others effect.”

In my time in restaurants, when we cross-trained an employee, that employee would be more willing to do unpleasant tasks to help set up the rest of the team. That cross-training showed just how uncool it was cleaning up someone else’s mess.

At the small business where I work, I’ve been known to delay certain tasks I don’t like doing. This means that everyone beyond me is delayed. Lately, I’ve been delayed by others, and it forced me to move up certain items on my priority list.

And now, I am seeing just how irritating schedule shenanigans can be.

If you have a Gen Why who has a few problems hooking up his teammates, give him a taste of what he’s creating. If he’s got a heart (and most of us do), you’ll probably see some positive changes in his work habits.

I found this October column in The Harvard Crimson, Harvard’s school paper. In short, it says that well-qualified, soon-to-be-Ivy-League-grads are worried about finding jobs in the financial sector.

As a recent graduate, this kind of gloom and doom column (even despite the columnist’s later attempt at levity) is like reality running up the Jolly Roger and taunting me with all the bounty I will never get. It’s like staring at a nautical chart that tells me only that I am lost. Quite possibly hopelessly lost.

Notice, however, the small, gray print that I’ve pointed out on the left side of this screen shot:

It says “Advertisement” (My apologies - I know it’s a little tough to make out.)

When I checked the column just before publishing this post, there was nothing in the space reserved for an advertisement. Now, if you think of this article as a reminder that I am lost at sea, what would you call a posting for a job appearing right next to it?

A treasure map.

And not only is it a treasure map, it’s a treasure map that is targeted at Harvard students, who I understand are highly sought after by managers who did not attend Yale.

Being relatively new to the suit and tie part of life, I find myself faced by a new work-related problem. Tomorrow, I have a job interview, so I will be in my finest duds. Unfortunately, there will from 3″-6″ of snow on the ground here in Denver.

My question is this: How do I get from my car to my interview without ending up looking like a yeti in a sports coat?

One of my goals in writing this blog is to help bridge the generational gap by showing employers that sarcasm, piercings, and tattoos aren’t always an indicator of someone who won’t perform well. In fact, sarcastic, tattooed, freaky punk rock people may prove themselves to be top performers if you give them the chance. But this should not be taken to mean that all social norms have changed. Some behaviors are still stupid, no matter what year you were born.

Take, for instance, a young woman who dropped in to apply at the retail store where I work. As she filled out her application, she was sitting on her boyfriend’s lap. Bouncing up and down. While he slapped her ass.

Really.

Upon seeing this, our HR manager quickly determined that no interview would be necessary with this particular individual. To this I say: Good call. Save that time for the kid with the tattoos who will work his butt off. (And not in the way the girl was.)

I wanted to take this opportunity to address a criticism that comes up frequently.

I’ve heard different variations on the theme, but it always boils down to something along these lines: You young people take yourselves too seriously. You want meaning in your uniform? MEANING!?! Are you so self-absorbed as to think that we care what your tattoos mean? Get over yourselves.

I will grant that on its face, what your young employees want to wear may seem unimportant with the bottom line at stake. It may seem especially frivolous when compared to your need to make mortgage payments while getting the kids wherever they need to be (frequently the three most geographically disparate locations possible).

Just last week, a friend of mine sat down for a discussion with his boss that illustrated this perspective perfectly. It went something like this:

BOSS: Let’s talk about your future with this company.
FRIEND: OK, cool.
BOSS: For the most part I have very positive things to say, but there is one part that might be hard for you.
FRIEND: OK. Let’s do it.

At this point, my friend was unsure if his boss was going to tell him that he lacked the experience, social skills, intelligence, or connections to actually advance in the company.

BOSS: I know this could be difficult, but if you’re planning to advance much further in this company, you’re probably going to have to take out your earrings and wear long sleeves to cover your tattoos.
FRIEND: Yeah, I know. When’s the hard part of this conversation?
BOSS: Oh, well I figured this was it.
FRIEND: Um, nope. Not hard at all. I like the earring and all, but I can always take it out. And I like money a lot more than the earring. You’re telling me that you didn’t want to bring up any glaring character flaws or skill deficits?
BOSS: Nope. That was it.

I think my friend’s boss walked away with a little better perspective on my friend’s thinking. My friend and I, (and most people my age) know that there are times when one must behave like a “professional adult.” What I express on this blog about uniforms are not demands, requirements, or ultimatums. Rather, I am sharing my preferences. Employers have recognized that minimizing turnover is good for the bottom line, and I am convinced that those employers who are able to align their practices with their employees’ preferences will decrease turnover.

And for the most part, that’s what is going on when your Gen Whys tell you they hate tucking in their shirts and shaving. They are expressing preferences. I don’t doubt that there will be a few Gen Whys who will demand some sort of uniform concession. I also know from experience that there is a portion of the population that, regardless of age group, will make absurd demands. I don’t expect you to cater to a 16-year-old young employee who behaves this way any more than I expect you to cater to a 60-year-old employee who behaves this way.

But the vast majority of employees don’t make demands. If you listen to their preferences, you’ll be able to better fight turnover, which is hardly a concession to a self-absorbed brat if you ask me.

I work in retail sales, so rather than sleeping off the brutality of the previous day’s turkey dinner and fantasy football blunders, I worked. My shift began at 4:45 am, and when I arrived there were already customers lined up outside the doors. I think this just goes to show that while the customer may always be right, the customer is not always sane.